The Jedi Order had a strict code: no attachments. Love wasn’t forbidden, but the kind of love that turned into fear of loss, obsession, or possessiveness – that was what they feared. And with Anakin Skywalker as the example, it’s easy to see why.
But Star Wars Rebels gave us a different story – one that showed what it could look like when love was healthy, balanced, and powerful. That story came from Kanan Jarrus and Hera Syndulla.
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Kanan Loved, But He Didn’t Lose Himself
What really stood out to me is how Kanan handled his relationship with Hera. He cared about her deeply. You could feel it in every moment they shared. But he never let that love control him. He wasn’t afraid of losing her. When he died to save her and the crew, he did it with clarity and purpose – not out of fear or desperation. That’s not something we saw from Anakin.
Kanan didn’t sacrifice himself because he couldn’t live without her. He did it because it was the right thing to do. That’s what makes his love so powerful. It gave him focus. He didn’t break the Jedi code in spirit – if anything, he honored it better than the ones who followed it blindly.
The Jedi Weren’t Against Love – They Just Feared What Comes With It
A lot of people get this part mixed up. The Jedi weren’t banning love itself. They taught compassion. Anakin even says that in Attack of the Clones. What they feared was attachment – the kind of love that turns into fear of loss. That’s where the problems start.
George Lucas actually explained this pretty clearly. He said:
“They can love people, they can do that, but they can’t attach. That’s the problem in the world of fear. Once you are attached to something, then you become afraid of losing it. And when you become afraid of losing it, then you turn to the dark side.”
Kanan loved Hera and the rest of the Ghost crew. But he didn’t cling to them. He didn’t try to change fate or cheat death. He let people make their own choices. That’s love without attachment – and that’s what the Jedi were really trying to teach.
Anakin’s story is the cautionary tale. He loved Padmé, but he couldn’t let go. He was terrified of losing her, and that fear led him down a dark path. Everything he did after that – turning on the Jedi, serving Palpatine, hurting the people he was supposed to protect – it all came from that obsession.
So yeah, the Jedi had a reason to worry. But instead of teaching Anakin how to handle those feelings, they told him to bury them. That isolation is part of what pushed him away.
The Jedi’s One-Size-Fits-All Rule Didn’t Work
I think this is where the Jedi really messed up. They made the no-attachment rule because it was easier to manage a huge Order. With thousands of Jedi spread across the galaxy, they couldn’t give personal guidance to everyone. So instead of helping individuals deal with emotions, they just banned attachments altogether. No relationships, no personal bonds—just follow the rule and move on.
But that kind of rule doesn’t work for everyone. It definitely didn’t work for Anakin. He needed help sorting through his feelings for Padmé, not silence. But the Jedi couldn’t even talk to him about it. They expected him to bury those emotions, and that only pushed him closer to Palpatine.
Now compare that to Kanan. After the fall of the Jedi Order, he wasn’t stuck under those strict rules. He had space to figure himself out, and because of that, he actually found a better balance. He wasn’t perfect, but he learned how to love without losing himself in it. That’s something Anakin never got the chance to do.
Bonus: Kanan Wasn’t The First Jedi Who Loved
Kanan wasn’t alone. Obi-Wan loved Satine, even though they didn’t act on it. Ki-Adi-Mundi had a family because his species needed it. The Order made exceptions when they had to. They just didn’t do it often.
Kanan and Hera’s bond worked because they understood each other. They didn’t let their love distract them from the mission. They fought side by side, with full respect for each other’s roles. That’s something rare – and something the Jedi could’ve learned from.