When Darth Vader Attended a Dinner Party and Then Dropped a Lethal Roast (Legends)

Some stories from Star Wars Legends sound wild even by galactic standards, and this one is right up there. I’m talking about the time Darth Vader showed up at a formal dinner, handled politics like a true Sith, and ended the night with one of the coldest roasts in the galaxy.

Dinner With A Sith Lord

Let’s start with the setting. Tiss’sharl was a sleek, high-tech planet in the Outer Rim, home to the reptilian Tiss’shar species. They were sharp-minded and efficient, but their politics were brutal. Backstabbing and assassinations weren’t scandals there—they were routine business.

When the Galactic Empire rose, the Tiss’shar became one of its suppliers. Everything went fine until the first Death Star got blown to bits. After that, the Empire needed cheap resources to rebuild. And since Darth Vader handled deals his own way, he was sent to Tiss’sharl to “renegotiate.” This wasn’t his first trip, either. He’d already been there twice, each visit cutting prices further.

This time, though, things got a lot more personal.

When Vader arrived, the new Tiss’shar President, Si-Di-Ri, decided to host a dinner for him. It was meant to be an elegant, diplomatic event. The food was even tailored to suit a human’s taste—rare effort for a reptilian species.

During dinner, the President and his advisors chatted about their political system. They talked openly about how dangerous it was, boasting about betrayals and assassinations like it was normal. I can imagine Vader sitting there in silence until he’d heard enough. Then he finally spoke, cutting straight through their small talk.

He informed them that their old Imperial overseer had been replaced by Commander Demmings, hinting that the last one probably died in one of their “accidents.” Then Vader locked eyes with Si-Di-Ri and said,

“There are dangers to all who wield power, be it man or snake.”

That word—snake—was a known slur for the Tiss’shar. Vader was there to remind everyone who actually held power in that room.

The Trade Deal With A Hidden Hook

After that chilling start, Vader laid out the new trade terms. They weren’t good, the Empire would pay far less for Tiss’sharl’s exports than before. The President and his staff protested, but Vader didn’t care for debates. They signed because they had no choice.

What none of them realized was that the deal itself was bait. Vader’s plan was to drive Si-Di-Ri to desperation. He knew the Tiss’shar leader would try reaching out to the Rebel Alliance for help, and when that happened, Vader would be ready to catch whoever the Rebels sent—someone he suspected would be Princess Leia Organa herself.

The next morning, Si-Di-Ri couldn’t take the pressure anymore. The new prices would destroy his planet’s economy, so he arranged a secret meeting with a Rebel contact. The man who showed up was a Mon Calamari senator, one of the last few who had served before the Imperial Senate got shut down.

The senator tried to convince Si-Di-Ri to join the Rebellion, saying the Empire would only keep bleeding Tiss’sharl dry. Si-Di-Ri hesitated. He wanted to fight back but feared the consequences. The argument dragged on until everything went silent—the air shifted.

Vader stepped out of the shadows.

The Lethal Roast

The Mon Calamari senator didn’t even get a word out before Vader raised his hand. The Force choke hit instantly. As the senator struggled for air, Vader explained that everything—the unfair deal, the desperation, the meeting—had been part of his setup. He told Si-Di-Ri that the Empire never lost control; it just waited for him to prove how easily he could be manipulated.

Vader then looked at the choking senator and said how surprised he was that the Rebels had sent someone so low-ranking. But before he could finish, the senator pulled a blaster and fired.

The shot didn’t matter. Vader’s red blade lit the room, and in one swift motion, the senator was gone. The Sith Lord paused for a moment, then finished his interrupted line—this time with precision.

“Surely a Princess could have charmed a snake better than a fisherman.”

He insulted both the Tiss’shar President and the dead Mon Calamari senator at once, using the most common slurs for their species. No one else in the room spoke after that.

Once the senator’s body hit the ground, Vader turned back to Si-Di-Ri. His voice was calm again.

“Still… you should be rewarded for your complicity in my ruse, unknowing though you were.”

He pressed his boot on the fallen blaster, looked down at the President, and added,

“TaggeCo can maintain its current price. My gift to you.”

That “gift” was control, Vader had gotten what he wanted and left the President humiliated but alive. The trade deal went back to normal, and Si-Di-Ri was reminded exactly how powerless he was.